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Wednesday, May 7, 2014 05:20:32 PM
HOLY SWEET CRAP IS THAT THING SCARY!!!

You can have your Sharknados or Piranha 3-Ds, Hollywood: real-life sea monsters kick your ass.

I was reading The Guardian online last night (if you don’t read it, you should — it’s a brilliant newspaper) when I came across this story about a Florida shrimp fisher who pulled this freaky-as-shit beast up onto his boat in April.

Apparently (and appropriately) it’s called a goblin shark, and it’s “the last surviving member of the Mitsukurinidae family, which dates back some 125 million years! It also generally lives thousands of feet under the surface — to a maximum depth of just over 4200 feet! That explains why they’re almost never seen by humans.

The one caught in recently in Florida measured roughly 18 feet long.

Jeebuz.

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